Listening is the cornerstone for effective communication. In some organizations, however, it's one of the least taught. That's unfortunate because it's the most important skill for any sales professional.
We spend a lot of time in training and development classes working on our communication skills such as questioning techniques, reaching decision makers, creating effective voice mail messages and so on. But if we don't spend the time learning how to listen well, we'll never be as effective as we can be.
Let's take a look at how our communication time is broken down. Studies have shown that we spend about 9% of our time writing, 13% of our time reading, 23% of our time speaking and 55% of our time listening. What's staggering about that is not only do we spend most of our time listening but that we spend double the time listening as we do speaking.
We are bombarded with thousands of messages every day. We couldn't possibly put concentration or energy into each one of them. Nor do we want to. Walking down the street talking to a colleague of friend, we want to be able to concentrate on what they are saying, not on the other noises around us. In a busy office, we want to be able to focus on the people we speak with on the telephone, not be distracted by people talking in the cubicle next to us. So... we become selective.
Since listening is a tool for better communication, here are some things to keep in mind:
You cannot not communicate. Even when we are not verbally saying anything, we transmit messages through our non-verbal's. How we dress, body language - in fact you can take whole courses on how to read non-verbal's.
In my work in inside sales and service training, I like to use the phrase "Communicating Blindfolded". When we use the telephone as a primary means of communication, we really have to consider the importance of our listening skills. It's been said that up to 80% of our communication skills are non-verbal. When we speak to someone on the telephone, in effect, we're only using about 20% of our skills.
It's as though we've been given a blindfold. It's important to be consciously aware of the increasing need for strong listening skills when communicating over the phone. I consider listening is one of the three legs of the communication stool we sit on when we communicate over the telephone. The other two are words and voice. When I began in inside sales, I only considered these last two - but the more time I spent in these activities the more I came to realize that I could never truly be effective - never really reach my potential - unless I acknowledged the need for, improved and used my listening skills.
One of the greatest obstacles to good listening is that we cannot transfer meanings from one mind to another - only words can be transferred. The challenge here is that we, as receivers, attach our own meanings to the words others send. This is among the many reasons I'm a huge fan of using clarifying questions when I speak with someone. Just because I attach a particular meaning to certain words or phrases, doesn't mean that other people do.
Regardless of the stage I'm in in sales process, I need to ensure that I understand what they mean and that they understand what I mean.
Listening is affected by selective attention. We decide on what we focus or to what we give our attention. We do this almost as a survival technique because we can't' possibly listen to and process every sound we hear. We need to use selective attention in order to listen actively. Actively listening means that we stay in the moment. We don't let our attention wander. If we're on the telephone, we don't succumb to the temptation of reading our emails, trolling the newsites online, reading that report on our desk.
Active listening allows us to focus on the message from the person we are speaking with.
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